until we meet again

i received a text today from my friend - his grandma died.  he was sad, he is sad.  he said he had been preparing for this for a while now and his preparation did not actually prepare him at all.  he said he couldn't truly understand why this was so hard and then he realized - he just lost his friend.  his confidant, his ally in this fight we call life.

i remember her.  she was kind.  funny.  sweet.  she was a grandma.  it reminded me of losing my grandparents - all of them.  some died when i was very young, my great-grandmother died when i was 6 and some stayed with me until i was 37 and that was it.  my grandparents were all gone.

my memories of all of them are "mostly" good.  some are just memories that they were here - nothing out of the ordinary or unique.  i miss some more than others, but in all, i just miss them.

i try to grasp why they all died so young and i think it's because they were always old.  it was different then.  40 was old.  my one grandmother had dentures when i was 8.  people didn't take care of themselves very well.  i digress.

this is a message to my friend - let your memories keep those lost near and dear to your heart - they are with us as long as we keep them in our hearts.