letting go

i've decided i'm bad at letting go.  death presents the greatest challenge but so many things fall into the "letting go category".  letting go of dreams.  hurts. expectations. feelings.

i'm letting go of the past and moving forward.  i will be strong.  i will prevail.  i will hit delete. i will let go.

friends

oh i am working too much these days - i have an event in 11 days - doh!  and when it's 'event time' i let my friends know that it will be challenging for me to stay in touch.  but what i am finding, this time, is that i am not willing to let that be the case.  i'm not willing to say you, my friend, are second to my work. 

so, thanks to the magic of facebook, i am able to stay in touch and still work.  it's a fabulous thing.  we engage in stimulating conversation, silly chats, and schedule our next meet and greet (uh oh, the event business has just penetrated my real life).  meet and greet?  no dear, it's called a drink.

so, to my dear friends, thank you for your patience and we will connect soon.

vindication

 

today i learned that the fight we at hanna's dream have been fighting is nearly over.  what did we win?  we won the plagiarizing fight.  someone had lifted the content from our website and today the host of the website shut them down!  wooo hoooo!!!!

it's a good day at hanna's dream!

issues

so i was talking to my friend today and i was lamenting about my life.  i'm tired. i'm sad. my feet hurt.  i miss my kid.  i'm in a different time zone.  my hotel room isn't cold enough and there is nothing on tv.

her response: "you have all sorts of issues"

I feel better.

time heals

it is said that time heals all wounds.  i sit here and wonder - does it?  today i thought a lot about hanna and i cried.  i thought of her mom, one of my best friends, and i wonder how she does it?  how does robin do it?  i was sad today when i thought of our hanna.  i thought of her silly laughter, how she loved to be the center of attention and how she would pose at a moments notice for the camera.

i thought of her dream of helping others and how that dream is now left for us, the one's left behind, to carry on.

i thought about the grieving process and how everyone does it different.  i wondered aloud, "how does robin do it?".  she has so much on her plate right now and yet every day she gets out of bed, runs her business and cares for her son.  i have a far less dramatic life and i am overwhelmed by the loss of hanna.  robin handles all of this will grace and dignity - i so envy her.

i thought about the years to come and how our hanna won't be here to create more memories; how she will forever be the 6 year old little girl whose smile could light a room.  i miss you terribly today and i'm waiting dear "time" - you can start healing whenever you like.